My chat with Mike Buonaiuto about LGBT issues

This week, I had a chat with Mike Buonaiuto. I work with Mike at Shape History, a social change company. He started Shape History just over a year ago. Since I first met Mike, I’ve come to realise that he has an incredible amount of passion and drive to create social good. One of the issues that Mike is determined to change, is the way in which LGBT people are seen across the world. I remember having a chat on my first or second week at Shape History with Mike at a pub (where all good conversations take place). We somehow got onto the topic of being gay, but in particular, language, categorisation and stigma. The conversation that we had was too good to keep to ourselves (well, what Mike had to say anyway). Mike’s enthusiasm of LGBT issues, coupled with his own personal experiences, combined with me sucking up to him, I thought that this week, it was a good idea to expand our little chat in the pub.

 I wanted to start by asking you about your own experience with being gay and the story of when you first ‘came out’?

The interesting thing about coming out is that you never stop coming out. When you start talking about your first time coming out, it’s obviously the most important because it’s most likely to be the people you care most about. Telling your loved ones is far more likely to be more momentous than telling the shop assistant when you’re buying flowers and they say “hey, nice bunch of flowers for your girlfriend”. You then have to question whether you want to actually come out again. It’s a pivotal moment and I think that given my personality, I take every moment to do it because it forces people to question their outlooks on gender and sexuality; the norms and what is acceptable and what isn’t.

I came out to my parents when I was 19. My dad was from a very strict Italian background, my mum, British. What was fascinating was that my dad was far more accepting of it at first than my mum was. This wasn’t because either of them had a problem with it but because my mum and I have such a close relationship and she felt very hurt that there was a ‘secret’, as it were, that I had kept from her when she thought that I could tell her absolutely anything. In essence, that was it.

My chat with Miriam Onwochei-Garcia on her volunteer experience in refugee camps.

This week I interviewed Miriam Onwochei-Garcia about her experience of volunteering to help with the refugee crisis in Calais (the jungle) and Dunkirk, with a particular focus on the vulnerability of women in these camps. We all know that there is a refugee crisis going on in Europe, but it’s all too easy to forget about what’s going on when we’re asleep, safe at home. To give you some stats, in 2015, over 1 million people (refugees, displaced persons and other migrants) made their way to Europe to either escape conflict in their home country or to find better economic prospects. In April of this year, 180,000 people reached Europe. They’ve arrived with no basic human necessities. There are so many ways in which we are able to help and the support given so far by ordinary Europeans has been enormous. Miriam volunteered her time for a total of two weeks on two different occasions during March. She did a huge variety of work, including helping in a medical centre, distributing aid to children and building work.

What were your first impressions of your volunteering experience?

The day before I arrived for the first time, the new Dunkirk camp, which houses the majority of the women and children had opened. I initially helped move a pregnant woman and her family to the new camp and as we were walking through the old Dunkirk camp, there were gas canisters going off. These explosions were set off by the refugees who’d been left behind because they were less vulnerable and the new camp didn’t have enough space for them. They were frustrated and they were protesting. It was freezing cold, and the conditions in that Dunkirk camp were appalling; you’re up to your knees in human excrement, the camp was built on bog land and the authorities had stopped any major aid getting through. No human should ever live like that. I think I counted 8 toilets, for at one point, 2,000 people and maybe 2 main taps that were functioning, no hot water, one main charging point.

My chat with Ben Leich about domestic abuse

This week, I spoke to Ben Leich about domestic abuse and domestic violence. I wanted to pick Ben’s brains on his knowledge of the issue as he works on social policy in the Department of Communities and Local Government as a Fast Stream Civil Servant. Simply put, he advises the government on issues ranging from domestic abuse, mental heath problems, people that are homeless and sleeping rough, and Troubled Families. Domestic abuse is an issue that will affect 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men in their lifetime. As Ben will explain below, it is an incredibly difficult issue to tackle due to its sensitivity and complexity of each individual case.

 Before we dive in, can you explain the difference between domestic abuse and domestic violence?

Domestic violence is relatively simple. Your partner is physically or sexually assaulting you or vice versa. Domestic abuse is a broader term, which is primarily used nowadays as it accounts for psychological controlling, or coercive behaviour, which may not be as clearly obvious as someone turning up to A&E with physical injuries. Domestic abuse can have huge impacts on someone’s mental health, which can be just as damaging as physical assault.

 

My chat with James Lindop on being a feminist

At the end of last year, Laura Bates wrote a Guardian article asking what your feminist new years resolution would be. I considered this. Before I indulge you, I want to make clear what feminism means to me. Feminism simply means gender equality and creating a society in which women’s social, political and economic rights are the same as their male counterparts. My feminist new years resolution is to start a blog that encourages us to consider feminism in this simple way. My aim is to sit down and chat with people from all walks of life about issues relating to gender. For my first blog post, I sat down with James Lindop, a friend of mine from University who has, ever since I’ve known him, considered himself a feminist.

Would you identify as a feminist?

Of course! And I wouldn’t even think about it. I’m quite happy to call myself a feminist. I don’t think it’s a big deal.

Have you always considered yourself or defined yourself as a feminist?

No. I think probably the first time I did it was when I studied feminism at A Level. Before that, I was quite ignorant I guess and I assumed feminism was something greater than or something more in depth or something that you had to study or something that wasn’t as clear-cut as what I believe it to be now.